(untitled)









i have no ambitions

i don't want to hate the president

i don't want to go to harvard

i don't want to win the pulitzer prize

i just want to sit in my bathtub

and think about relationships i will never have

with people i will never meet

and then go lay in my bed

with a magnifying glass

and count all the stiches in my sheets

until i fall asleep

and wake up

to repeat again.







cheese beast going through cheese withdrawal










i might work in a laundromat!

the one here is looking for someone to work late nights or early mornings during the summer!

i might work in a 24 hour laundromat! 

i'm going to clean things and people will give me tips to fold and wash their laundry! 

when no one is looking im going to bury my face in the clean laundry and smell it! 

i won't have any co-workers!

i will sit in the laundromat at 2 in the morning alone and smell things and listen to dryers! 

i will listen to dryers!

from now on all of my paintings are going to be of laundromats and things inside of 
laundromats!

people will give me money to listen to dryers!

i will warm my hands in clean laundry that i will take out of the dryers when they are finished 
drying!

im buying a new bike!

with tires that aren't rotting!

i won't have to buy a car!

i ate sticky rice and bought you chocolate with no dairy in the chocolate! 

i can ride my bike to the laundromat!

i can tie a box to the back of my new bike and put my cat in it!

i might work in a laundromat!

i will probably never work in a Laundromat






cheese beast waking from nightmare about a world without cheese








Jean Rhys

I'm preparing myself for an extended period of loneliness

That will begin very soon I think

I've illegally downloaded two new depressing songs

I've placed a copy of 'good morning, midnight' under my pillow for easy reference

I've printed out the tablature for every Morrissey song I know so I can sing them

To myself alone in my room

Just a few things are needed really

To make me calm

While I figure out a simple, clean, and effective way to kill myself,

With minimal stress for the person who has to find and dispose of my body

But I'll probably never think of a way

Because I'll probably never kill myself

I'll just lie in my bed suffocating myself with my pillows

While listening to the four songs you said were your favorite

And maybe burn myself a little with the iron

On special occasions

And the next time I'm in a subway station,

I'll stand a little further on the yellow line

Or maybe the next time I'm at your apartment

I'll try a little harder






decapitated beast head floating in outer space humilated after jet li beat it in 
tennis match and cut off head with racket then knocked it into space to show off









i want to kill everyone you know and then myself

stop staring at me

my body is so small compared to the sun

my heart is so small







panda screaming in agony





an uneventful story about a person and a dog in an apartment that the majority of the 
population would react to by saying 'i don't understand what the point of this is'

a person wakes up in a bed that is really just a bare twin-sized mattress set directly on the floor 

the bed is in a room that only has a bed

the room is in an apartment that is only a room

inside the apartment is a bed and a laptop and a toilet and a sink and a shower and a mini 
refridgerator and an oven with a stovetop and a toy poodle without a name

the person walks to the toilet and pees

the toy poodle is lying in the corner staring at the person peeing

the person walks to the mini refridgerator and takes out a box of vegan burgers and looks at the 
vegan burgers then puts the vegan burgers back into the mini refridgerator

the person looks out of the only window in the apartment that is only 2 feet by 2 feet big and 
a little dirty and sees a pigeon fly into a window of another apartment and fall 20 stories to the 
sidewalk

the person walks back to the mini refridgerator and takes out a portabella mushroom the size of 
their hand and washes it in the sink then eats it raw

the person eats the mushroom and thinks 'fungus, i'm eating fungus' while eating the mushroom 
and doesn't really laugh but opens their eyes a little bigger and then returns them to a neutral 
position

the person eats around the stem of the mushroom and then eats the top of the stem then feeds 
what is left of the stem to the toy poodle

the toy poodle picks up the stem in its mouth and then drops it back on the floor and walks back 
to the corner and falls asleep






I am hurting the world and every I know because of the following reasons

1.	If I do not change, I will continue to lie, therefore causing others to lose trust in me, 
	therefore preventing myself from ever having a successful and honest relationship with a 
	person, therefore reducing meaning in my life.

2.	If I continue to lie, I will continue to avoid taking responsibility for my actions. 
	Therefore, I won’t understand why my actions are harmful. Therefore, I won’t understand 
	how I need to change my thinking.

3.	If I do not change, I will continue to base my thoughts off of other people’s feelings, 
	therefore not think on my own, therefore not being able to control my life.

4.	If I do not change, I will continue to lie, therefore causing the people in my life to lose 
	trust in me, therefore making them feel manipulated and mislead, therefore putting them 
	at risk for feeling insignificant, therefore causing them pain and suffering.

5.	If I do not change, I will continue to eat animal products, therefore I will be financially 
	supporting companies who hurt animals and cause pollution through raising animals, 
	therefore I am increasing their ability to continue their business, therefore I am aiding the 
	pollution of water, degradation of the soil, pollution from the fumes of their transport 
	vehicles, interruption of the natural food chain, creation of more ammonia in the 
	atmosphere.

6.	If I do not change, I will continue to eat more foods that aren’t organically grown, 
	therefore causing pollution from pesticides, therefore causing rapid degradation of the 
	soil, therefore reducing the amount of land that can be used to produce food for people 
	who don’t have enough food to keep them alive, therefore aiding in high costs of food 
	productions, therefore making it harder for people to afford food, therefore aiding in the 
	starvation of others, therefore causing more pain and suffering.

7.	If I do not work, I will always be expecting other people to do the work for me, therefore 
	I will be hindering my ability to work on my own, therefore I am proving that I am trying 
	to change for other people instead of myself, therefore I’m putting myself at risk for 
	basing my thoughts off of other people’s feelings, therefore I won’t be thinking about 
	what I want, therefore I will only do what other people tell me, therefore reducing 
	meaning in my life.